Noah the Jewish Fly, Chapter 10

  "Master, I had an encounter with the Lord of the Flies."
  "Tell me about it," Jesus replied.
  "I don't know if it was a dream or a vision but it seemed very real,"  I said.  "We met in an oasis.  He was dressed all in white, which I thought was ironic to the tenth power.  His robe, tunic, turban and sandals were all decorated with gold and precious stones.  With his white hair and beard and pleasant expression he had the demeanor of a friendly prosperous merchant."
  "What made you think he was Satan?
  "I wasn't sure at first but I knew who he was  after he began talking.  He had an oily tongue and lies slid of it easily and often.  He did confess that Noah Flies had been an aggravation to him since they came off the Ark because they had always refused to kneel to him.  But he said he felt sure that I was different than all the others that came before me."
  "Different?  How?"
  "He said I was more likely to be up-to-date, more modern in my thinking and not hampered by old- fashioned religious ideas like my predecessors.  Surely, he said, you're smart enough to have already figured out that God expects us to use our own intelligence so that we can make choices and control and use that intelligence to determine our own destiny.  Who says we need a great nanny in the sky to tell us what's right and wrong?   That's a myth conjured up by weak-minded people who didn't know any better.  Remember, Satan said, when Moses went up on Mount Sinai to carve the Ten Commandments into the stone tablets? The Israelites at the base of the mountain hardly waited 'til Moses was out of sight before they began molding a golden calf to worship. See?  When push comes to shove, people want something tangible for security, something they can experience with their senses and they want it now, not pie in the sky in the sweet bye and bye."
  "Moses carved the Commandments into the stone tablets?  That's news to me," Jesus observed wryly. "He's still recycling the same old lies and deceptions." 
  "I asked Satan why he thought he could mock God with impunity.  He puffed up and declared that he was God's equal.  At one point, he said, he was one of God's favorite angels, but over time he began to wonder why God should have all the glory.  He talked it over with some of the other angels and they urged Satan to confront God with a proposition to set up two thrones in Heaven; one for God and the other for Satan. God will not share his glory with anyone so Satan was kicked out of heaven along with all of his conniving angels."
  "Yes," Jesus said.  "And I saw Satan fall like lightning."
  "He glossed over that part like he intended to leave Heaven anyway.  He said he was tired of the place and if there wasn't any chance for advancement, what would be the point in staying?  It was apparent that he wanted to change the subject because then he said he had the power to give me anything I might want.  He said he had put a package of goodies together that was bigger and better than anything he'd offered to my ancestors to get them to change their allegiance. Every earthly pleasure would be mine for the asking."
  "I can imagine," Jesus said.
  "First, he would make me into a human: young, handsome and rich.  Next, he would give me twelve palaces, each one in the center of a golf course. What's a golf course?"
 "Something in the future," Jesus answered.
 "Oh? Well anyway he emphasised that each palace would not be at the edge of a golf course but right in the middle. After that he promised a thousand of the best horses and the latest chariots made entirely of gold; riches beyond anything I could imagine; a constant stream of beautiful young virgins for my selection and I would move in the social circles of kings, princes and all the movers and shakers.  Beyond that I would be famous throughout the world.  All this and more would be mine if I denounce you as an impostor and return to his kingdom."
  "What was your answer?"
  "I said I didn't want anything he offered. It was all temporary and one day it would be only dust and not even a  memory.  That you, Jesus, offered eternal spiritual riches that will never pass away plus joy, peace and love right now."
  "How did he take your answer?"
  "In spectacular fashion I must say. His eyes turned bright red and flames shot out of his ears and mouth.  Although enveloped in the fire I was not harmed. But the oasis that had been so beautiful and green a moment before was now black earth and charred tree stumps.  Satan said I was a fool to put my trust in Jesus because I was betting on a dead horse.  He would prove that in just a few weeks and I would see Satan's victory when my hope was hanging on a tree.
  "At that moment a very odd-looking chariot without horses appeared next to him.  It was long and had four wheels.  On the side were the numbers 666.  Satan got into the vehicle and told me to remember that although I had turned down his wonderfully generous offer of a better and more exciting life, he would not give up on me.  Then, laughing like a goosed hyena, he and the chariot disappeared.  Jesus, what did Satan mean about my hope would soon be hanging on a tree?"