My wife and I had arrived at our commitment to Christ through the work of the Holy Spirit even though we knew very little about Him. We had read the name of the Holy Spirit many times in the Communion service and said many times in reciting the Apostle's Creed that we believed in Him. But we hadn't a clue about who the Holy Spirit is. Third Person of the Trinity....right? Or something like that. That was the sum of our knowledge.
We were like the disciples Paul encountered at Ephesus. When he asked them, "Did you receive the Holy Spirit when you believed?" They answered, "No. We don't know what you mean. We haven't even heard there is a Holy Spirit." (Remember that incident. I'll refer to it again in later blogs.) There are many in the church today who might respond to Paul's question in a similar way.
Our ignorance did not prevent the Spirit from operating in the team of lay people who came to our church the fateful weekend that would totally change our lives. I had no intention of attending that weekend event. But something happened that some might consider coincidence. My brother, Dick, called to say he and his wife Delia, would be coming from Houston as members of the team. As a matter of courtesy, I invited them to stay in our home. When they arrived I agreed to go to the first session on Friday night and then planned to find some excuse to skip the rest of the meetings.
On Friday night my brother and his wife had to go early for a team meeting and Nita and I rode along with them. There were three or four people present when we entered the fellowship hall but my gaze was drawn to one person, a stranger, seated at the far end of the hall. When he saw us, he grinned, leaped from his chair and quickly walked.....almost ran....to where I stood. He grabbed my hand, pumped it vigorously and, with great enthusiasm, said, "God loves you and I love you too!"
I was shocked and repulsed.. What could make a supposedly sane person act in such a bizarre way? How weird, I thought. He loves me? Ridiculous. He doesn't even know me. After he released his his grip my first reaction was to go back to the safety of my home before this 'fanatic' had a chance to hug me or do something equally repugnant and embarrassing. But, I didn't leave. Thank God.
After the crowd arrived the session began with dinner. Following dinner visiting team members were called on to each bring a short testimony. One of those was my brother. Coincidence again? I thought I knew all about my brother but as he spoke I could see something new in him as he related how Christ had changed his life. Those that followed my brother also testified about the difference Christ had made in them. Although still a bit skeptical, how could I disagree with them? I didn't have a spiritual leg to stand on. In spite of lingering resistance, I found myself becoming more and more interested in what they had to say.
Hmm, I thought. Maybe there's something to this after all. Think I'll stick around.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Monday, May 18, 2009
My Journey to the Son Part 4
ERRATA NOTE
(I had a visit last week with a friend who had been in the couple's class I taught years ago. In going over times and dates with him I realized I had made an error. It was actually 12 years between our arrival in Lufkin and my invitation to start the new class.; not a year or 18 months.)
PART 4
"I am like a pelican in the wilderness: I am like an owl in the desert. I watch, and am as sparrow alone upon the housetop." Psalm 102:6
The psalmist's description of feeling lost and alone could have been my lament in 1969. In the 12 years before I started teaching, I and my family attended Sunday school and church regularly but the best I can say for my spiritual growth is that it was minimal. However, I gave a very good impression of looking and walking like a Christian and could, when pressed, talk like a Christian. But I was a grade A phony; a cardboard Christian. I was a pew potato; a pew warmer.
I was like the psalmist's pelican: spiritually distant from where I should have been; an owl in the desert, nesting in the ruins of my existence. I was sitting beside the lonely sparrow, watching but not seeing, listening but not hearing.
Recently, one Sunday in church, My wife and I sat behind a young couple and their two children. They were in my direct line of sight to the pulpit so I couldn't miss what happened. During the sermon the wife slowly turned her head in her husband's direction just enough so she could see him from the corner of her eye. A slight movement of her arm and his reaction indicated a jab to his ribs. He gave her a sour look and straightened up. Had he nodded off? Probably, but I don't know. This all took place within a few seconds. I thought, "I know where he's coming from because I've been there. Be in church to set a good example for the kids. Show up; do my duty."
(I had a visit last week with a friend who had been in the couple's class I taught years ago. In going over times and dates with him I realized I had made an error. It was actually 12 years between our arrival in Lufkin and my invitation to start the new class.; not a year or 18 months.)
PART 4
"I am like a pelican in the wilderness: I am like an owl in the desert. I watch, and am as sparrow alone upon the housetop." Psalm 102:6
The psalmist's description of feeling lost and alone could have been my lament in 1969. In the 12 years before I started teaching, I and my family attended Sunday school and church regularly but the best I can say for my spiritual growth is that it was minimal. However, I gave a very good impression of looking and walking like a Christian and could, when pressed, talk like a Christian. But I was a grade A phony; a cardboard Christian. I was a pew potato; a pew warmer.
I was like the psalmist's pelican: spiritually distant from where I should have been; an owl in the desert, nesting in the ruins of my existence. I was sitting beside the lonely sparrow, watching but not seeing, listening but not hearing.
Recently, one Sunday in church, My wife and I sat behind a young couple and their two children. They were in my direct line of sight to the pulpit so I couldn't miss what happened. During the sermon the wife slowly turned her head in her husband's direction just enough so she could see him from the corner of her eye. A slight movement of her arm and his reaction indicated a jab to his ribs. He gave her a sour look and straightened up. Had he nodded off? Probably, but I don't know. This all took place within a few seconds. I thought, "I know where he's coming from because I've been there. Be in church to set a good example for the kids. Show up; do my duty."
At age 44 I was trudging through life, painfully aware something was definitely missing. On the surface it appeared to others that everything was going well. But, as a father and a husband I was not what I should have been. I tried, unsuccessfully, to use my profession to cover the growing dissatisfaction that stuck pins in my heart. I can understand why some people turn to drugs, alcohol or illicit sex. I didn't but the temptation was there. Increasingly I recognized the reason for my unrest. I tried to avoid it but the truth had been seeping into my consciousness for years: I was not right with God. In spite of attending church for many years I didn't know what to do about it; where to find the handle on Jesus....how to grab hold of Him.
One Sunday, in desperation, I stopped a friend in the narthex of our church and blurted out, "How are you saved?" She laughed because, as she told me later, she thought I was joking. She also told me she didn't answer because, at the time, she didn't know the answer either!
Looking back I wonder how many church members I would have had to ask before I got a true answer. Also, why it never occurred to me to talk to our pastor about salvation. One reason may have been embarrassment. I thought I was the one black sheep; the only one in the church who was not saved. Little did I know. As things turned out, I discovered how very little I knew.
God knows the desire of the heart even when the desire is buried deep in our spirit, covered with a mountain of sin and doubt. When our desire is for Him, when we "hunger and thirst for righteousness," he will arrange our circumstances so we can find Him. Oswald Chambers said, "When we deliberately choose to obey Him, He will reach to the remotest star and the ends of the earth to assist us with all His mighty power."
For us , God arranged for a group of Christians to come to our church for a weekend called a Lay Witness Mission. My wife and I heard testimonies and attended small group meetings from Friday evening to Sunday morning. By then we understood that God loved us and knew us by name. On Sunday, my wife and I walked the aisle and gave our lives to Jesus and to gratefully accept what he had done for us at the cross. At the time the theological details were hazy to us. But our commitment to Jesus was clear and real.
Blessings to all
Thursday, May 14, 2009
My Journey to the Son Part 3
After settling in our rented home we joined Lufkin's First Methodist church. This enabled us to meet people in a town where we only knew my employer and his family. I joined a men's Sunday school class and Nita joined a women's class. Over time I became quite impressed with the class teacher, Ward Burke, who seemed to have the respect of everyone. With my wordly mind I eventually reasoned that to have the same status as Mr. Burke it would be helpful for me to have a class to teach. It didn't occur to me that, spiritually, I was probably the least prepared person in Texas to take on such a responsibility. But, combine ambition with stupidity and common sense doesn't stand a chance.
About 18 months later I was approached by the Minister of Education. He aked if I would be willing to be the teacher of a new class of young couples. Now; some would call this event the mysterious work of God; others might see it as coincidence. Me? I saw it as plain good luck.
In any case I quickly agreed and the class was organized with about a half dozen couples.
For reasons I don't remember or never knew, the class prospered and membership expanded until there were about 40 members. Apparently I was the only one who read the lesson book and I had learned enough churchy lingo to put on a pretty good show. I know I said some things that I later had to ask God to forgive. I was a perfect example of everything a Sunday school teacher should not be and why teachers should be examined to evaluate their spiritual depth.
At that point in my life I should have been happy. I wasn't. I suppose many men would have liked to have been in my position. I had a loving wife, 3 fine healthy children, a good job and a new house. The future looked good. But something like a fog of discontent seemed to have enveloped me. Something was missing from this rosy picture but I couldn't imagine what it could possibly be. After all, hadn't I realized the American Dream?
God bless you.
Romans 15:13
About 18 months later I was approached by the Minister of Education. He aked if I would be willing to be the teacher of a new class of young couples. Now; some would call this event the mysterious work of God; others might see it as coincidence. Me? I saw it as plain good luck.
In any case I quickly agreed and the class was organized with about a half dozen couples.
For reasons I don't remember or never knew, the class prospered and membership expanded until there were about 40 members. Apparently I was the only one who read the lesson book and I had learned enough churchy lingo to put on a pretty good show. I know I said some things that I later had to ask God to forgive. I was a perfect example of everything a Sunday school teacher should not be and why teachers should be examined to evaluate their spiritual depth.
At that point in my life I should have been happy. I wasn't. I suppose many men would have liked to have been in my position. I had a loving wife, 3 fine healthy children, a good job and a new house. The future looked good. But something like a fog of discontent seemed to have enveloped me. Something was missing from this rosy picture but I couldn't imagine what it could possibly be. After all, hadn't I realized the American Dream?
God bless you.
Romans 15:13
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